The Neglected Soul
by TheCivilState
Summary: She had been told once that someone would love her.  Rebekah is still waiting.


_There's a girl_

Rebekah Mikaelson was a beauty, there was no denying that. A teenaged dream to the high school boys of Mystic Falls and that would have been a fun life to live in, she thought, if she had been an actual teenager and if she was a dream.

That was the part she liked the most. Being a dream implied she wasn't real. That when someone awoke in the morning, she would disappear and cease to exist. Less than vapor. No one would miss her.

If she were a dream, she could understand why no one would miss her. But she wasn't a dream, so she didn't understand.

_And though she smiles_ _There is something just hiding_ _And she cant find a way to relate_

"Bekah, come out with us!" Klaus had his arm casually tossed around Caroline's shoulders and despite the fact she loved the affection he gave her, she still elbowed him away and pretended to fix her hair.

"Not this time," Rebekah said, looking forward to a quiet evening at home. But Klaus was relentless, so she found herself inevitably tagging along to the Grill where Kol was working his way through the bar's liquor. He toasted them and they all began to drink, each for their own reasons.

Kol wanted to drown the memories of Violet whose funeral had been earlier in the day. Klaus wanted to loosen up and forget that he was the useless older brother who couldn't ease his younger brother's pain. Caroline wanted to have a good time and thought a pair of beer goggles would make her oblivious to the pain around her.

Rebekah drank because she found herself left alone at the bar as her brothers and Caroline picked up a game of pool. Rebekah drank because she was alone and she wanted to forget that.

_She just goes unnoticed_ _As the crowd passes by_ _And she'll pretend to be busy_ _When inside she just wants to cry_

They day of Violet's funeral, Rebekah had stood behind her brothers in support, but while her physical body was present, her mind was elsewhere.

She'd never understood Violet's appeal. Her gray eyes had been too big and even when she was a grown woman, she still had the appearance of a child. Her hair was too long and she insisted on wearing flowers in it as a child, flowers Kol asked his sister to place in the dead vampire's hair before they burned her.

"I hate you," Rebekah had whispered as she threaded daisies into Violet's braids. She was dead now, her body nothing but a rotting corpse tinged blue. "I hate you so much."

There was a small thrill of delight that ran through her body as she watched Violet burned. But then she saw the faces of her brothers and felt ashamed, disgusted, appalled at her own behavior. They were grieving the death of a woman they had cared for and she was delighting in her death.

That was because Rebekah felt she had been replaced by the impish, gray eyed girl who had charmed her family. She wondered if anyone would miss her as much when she was gone.

_The beginning, in the first weeks of class_ _She did everything to try and fit in_

Attending high school had been Rebekah's decision. Originally, it involved petty things like dethroning Caroline Forbes and Elena Gilbert as the Queen Bees of Mystic Falls High. Originally, it had been a way to infiltrate the school system should Klaus ever need assistance in that department. Originally, it was because Rebekah wanted to pretend she was normal and who better to make her feel that way than a group of high school students?

Her first day of class, Rebekah had walked in after the final bell rang. She had been informed later that meant she was late and being late was not a good thing. There was no fashionably late in high school and Rebekah soon discovered her idea of fashionable was not the high school norm. Boys stared lustfully at her while their girlfriends gossiped behind her back as if she wasn't a vampire with heightened senses who could hear all their petty comments.

"_I heard she got knocked up in Richmond and had a kid and then moved here."_

"_Look at that outfit. Do you think her parents buy her all that stuff, or does she have a sugar daddy?"_

"_I heard she was that new guy's sister. I bet it's like Twilight and they're sleeping together."_

"_Who the hell does she think she is? Doesn't she know we don't want her here?"_

Like a normal teenager, those petty comments made Rebekah go home and cry.

_But the others they couldn't seem to get past all the things that mismatched on the surface_

She put feathers in her hair because the stylist at the salon told her it was the style. She ripped them out though when a few girls pointed and laughed at the neon colored feathers in her blonde hair. _Blonde? Maybe from a bottle blonde. _She didn't know when women had become so catty. The world was not like this before Nik daggered her. Maybe he could put her back in her coffin. Drop her to the bottom of the ocean. Leave her there.

She chose a red dress for the school dance because it was the one Elena Gilbert picked. While they weren't friends, Rebekah didn't believe the doppleganger had any reason to choose an out of style gown that would make Rebekah the laughing stock of homecoming. She never got the chance to wear it before Elena put a dagger through her back. She had felt betrayed and a little hurt, but above all there was relief.

Now she had a legitimate reason not to attend the dance and discover a group of girls would have called her a tramp no matter what she arrived wearing. Now she could sleep and forget everything.

_And the more that they joked_ _And the more that they screamed_ _She retreated to where she is now_

"Our sister is a strumpet, but at least she's having a good time." Rebekah had hurled her shoe at Kol, something she'd always done. And as always, he had dodged it and run away with Klaus as they always did. They were always running away from her.

"She is our mother," Rebekah had argued with Elijah, but the argument sounded painfully weak ever to her own ears. Elijah left her with her delusions. He left her like Klaus and Kol had.

Eventually, even Finn came to look in on her as she sat staring into nothingness. Perhaps she could turn herself into a stone if she remained still long enough. A monument unto herself.

Finn had always promised to stay with her, but after nine hundred years in a coffin, that promise meant nothing. So he left. Like Kol, like Klaus, like Elijah; he left.

Like their mother. That part felt like a dagger to the back. Rebekah would know.

_Take a little look at the face of Miss Always Invisible_ _Look a little closer and maybe then you will see why she waits for the day that you will ask he_r _her name_

"_It is alright if your mother did not love you," _a young Violet had said,_ "There will be others who shall love you in her stead."_

Rebekah had never been fond of the little imp, but found herself thinking of her as she curled her hair for school. There was no reason to attend class, it was petty really, but she needed to get away from the house that smelled like death with walls that bleed with grief.

Finn and a few others had believed Violet had the gift of sight. Rebekah thought it all ridiculous, but still found herself clinging to the child's prophetic words. _There will be others who shall love you. _She was still waiting for those others. She had waited for them when Katerina ran away and her brothers pursued the doppleganger. She was waiting when dirty looks were cast her way for wearing trousers- _and after her experience with high school, those dirty looks were nothing. _She was waiting when the Roaring 20's rolled around and Klaus put a dagger in her heart and let her sleep. She was waiting when she woke up that morning and she was waiting when she left the house and headed to school.

Rebekah was always left waiting.

_And one day just the same as the last_ _Just the days spent in counting the time_

"Afternoon drinker? You're turning into Damon." Rebekah lifted her head from her glass and found Stefan seated beside her at the bar. She never made it to class, opting to stop at the Grill for a quick drink which had turned into several drinks.

"Please don't compare me to your brother," she said, downing the rest of her drink and signaling for another round. Stefan waved the bartender away and she growled at him. He was unperturbed.

"Heard about your rendezvous with Damon," he remarked casually as if they were discussing the weather.

"And what concern is my love life to you?"

"You do know he's in love with Elena, right?" Rebekah laughed, a bitter, hollow sound. She had no delusions, no fairytale expectations of her night with Damon. It was raw and needy and fueled with alcohol. Neither of them wanted each other in the morning. He wanted to hurt Elena and she had been glad to help. Once the doppleganger arrived at the boardinghouse though, Rebekah realized the game was over and left. She'd always been good at knowing when she wasn't wanted. She'd had centuries of practice with her brothers.

"Everyone's in love with that doppleganger wench," she said, standing and attempting to pull her coat on. She had nowhere to go, but if Stefan wasn't going to let her drink, there was no purpose in her staying at the Grill. There never was a purpose for her staying anywhere.

"Let me help you." She stilled as his hands brushed her shoulders as he helped her with her coat. She turned to face him, eyes sadder than they'd ever been.

"You loved me once," she said, "After Katherine and before Elena. Is it wrong for me to think you could love someone who isn't Tatia's doppleganger?" Stefan wrapped his arm around her, drawing her close and steering them out of the bar.

"Come on," he said, "I'll take you home."

She imagined he really did kiss her hair. He acted like she didn't notice. They were both leaving, but they were leaving together and for once Rebekah wasn't left alone.

_Came a boy that sat under the bleachers just a little bit further behind_

**a/n: **Beks doesn't get nearly enough love. If I wrote the show, she would be a very loved girl.

Fave, flame, faint.

_[song fic inspired by "Miss Invisible" by Marie Digby]_

_oxox_


End file.
